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12/08/2002 Entry: "bad" I'm getting really fucking sick of this site only working every once in awhile. Please, leave a comment if you too have the experience of this site being down randomally while the rest of Chegg works. I want to know if it's just my stupid computer or the server. I should be reading philosophy right now, but I'm not. I don't think I really want to read why John Hick thinks that God exists. I don't give a fucking shit. His logic is going to suck, I know that, you know that, why bother? I thought in the shower tonight. Now I'm listening to Tool. The running joke around here seems to be that I am a lousy boyfriend. That doesn't really bother me, because I'm long overdue for being the butt of relationship jokes. I am definately owed them, since I've made fun of other people quite often. And, of course, no one really means any harm. It just kind of sucks when you start to think that they might be right. It's a great night outside right now. Warm, windy, it feels like summer. I want a huge lightening storm, I want a gigantic fire, I want a flood of rain to come pouring down so I can go stand in it, arms outstretched, and scream at it. The way I feel right now I would probably win. I hate studying all day. It leaves me with energy at night. And when one feels angst because he managed to fuck everything up, it's not good to have energy as well. Maybe I just shouldn't shower anymore... or think anymore... Or, I could channel my energy into disproving stupid God theories once again. Ah, yes, productivity. As usual, typing is theraputic. Now if only I didn't have to copy and paste this out of notepad later just so I could post it. Fuck you, Tito. //edit: On a slightly related note, She is happy right now. All smilely and laughy. That makes me happy. It might not (probably isn't) due to my doing, but it's still something. Yay. Oh, and the God paper was stupid. He was a moron. In case you wanted to know.
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